The Importance Of Intimacy| Relationship Series

Well, guys, it’s been quite some time since the first post in this series, but before I could write about this specific topic, I wanted to get different views on it as not everyone experiences or sees it the same way.

So before we jump right into this, happy new year guys, I hope this year will bring growth and neverending happiness to your life. May you excel in every way possible 🙂
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I’ve noticed that a lot of South African/ African Influencers/ bloggers always shy away from topics like this, they would cover the basics of how to make your relationship work but they often leave out the part that I feel like most of us would relate to: Intimacy.

So, here goes.

Now intimacy is so much more than just the physical aspect of the word, there are so many levels to it, when you google the meaning of intimacy the below definition comes up:


‘Closeness, Love, warmth, lovemaking’ just a few words associated with the topic at hand, but the real question here is, how important is it in a relationship? Does it play a huge role in your relationship? Do you think your relationship can survive without it especially in the world we live in today where you can basically get the physical part anywhere if you really wanted to? and by that I mean sex.

Okay, let’s break it down, shall we?

I’m a firm believer in connecting with your partner emotionally first, the rest will follow. For me, the emotional part has ALWAYS been the most important part of intimacy. If I can connect with the person I’m with on a deep level, I’ll automatically be more attracted to them, which makes the physical part that much better.
I’ve never been with someone that I had no emotional connection with, however small it was, but before I give you my final opinion on this topic, let’s explore the different views.

I decided to ask my Instagram followers and WhatsApp contacts the following question:





















Interesting right?!

So the reason I focussed on the physical part in my questions, is purely to see if anyone would bring up the fact that being intimate with your partner is so much more than getting some on the regular. Yes, I agree with all of them on certain points, but at the end of the day it all comes down to the type of person you are and what you really want out of your relationship. For most people it’s not even an option due to health reasons, whereas some prefer it, they can not picture being with someone without being physical, for them that can never work out, the rest, on the other hand, would rather have any type of intimacy than none at all.

The more I explore this topic the more I realize that this is actually such a broad topic as it can go so many ways, lead to, in some cases even depression and before you kill me with the how’s, I’ll explain.

Whether we like it or not, we as women are sensitive beings when it comes to relationships. The moment your partner does not do the things he used to do, you’ll start questioning yourself, start having doubts, start feeling like you are not enough or that the fault lies with you. This often leads to you not feeling good about yourself which inevitably can lead to depression.

So what does all of this mean?

I personally feel like sex does play a huge role in any relationship. It does not have to be the only intimate thing between you and your partner, but if we have to be completely honest with each other, in most relationships it is the most important part, as it is seen as the most sacred, intimate way of being with someone, I mean it’s mind, body and soul and that shit is deep guys. So imagine taking away the body part, sure the mind and soul is still there in some way but what happens when you lose the mind part? Do you think the soul part will still be left if the middle man is gone? I don’t.
I think it creates a ripple effect, and before you know it, you’re looking back wondering, how things got this far.


It all really goes hand-in-hand. You cannot have the one without the other, at least not for long.

Look at it this way, it’s human nature to want to be with the one you love completely, even if we say it’s not important or it does not matter because loving the person is enough etcetera, etcetera.

So in closing, Intimacy is IMPORTANT, very important, both emotionally and physically. The one can’t be without the other, it is impossible.

I hope you can relate to this in some type of way or that it has created a discussion point with you and your partner.

That’s all for now, till next time. Who knows there might be a part 2 to this.

Love, Always.

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